If only you knew,

That the life we serve is one of pain, loneliness, and sacrifice. Not the honor and glory you perceive.

If only you knew,

How our families suffer as we do when we are gone. In some ways theirs is the harder road. We are doing our “job”, they must carry on, as life does not stop.

If only you knew,

The distinctive mixed smell of smoke, gunpowder, and blood. The sense of time compressing, the loudest sounds you can imagine being a muffled roar, and the movement of people being nothing more than fleeting shadows as chaos reigns.

If only you knew,

What it is like to miss meals, lose sleep and suffer the psychological, emotional and physical strains of serving others, with the knowledge that some do not care.

If only you knew,

How it feels to suddenly awake after only 2 hours sleep and having spent the past two days awake. To have to come out of the fog ready to make decisions in a split second, asking yourself; 
“is it minor or life-threatening?”
“have they all made it out or is someone left-behind?”
“what is out there that is waiting to hurt me?”
and the worst question of all,
“am I too late?”

If only you knew,

My thoughts and feelings as I work to bring life back to the mangled remains of a young warrior the same age as my son.

If only you knew,

How your faith in the world can be renewed by a 19 year old who refuses medical treatment so you can take care of his buddy instead.

If only you knew,

That commitment and respect in our youth of today are not lost, being displayed as you evacuate the body of young man who has given all for his country, yet the highest honor ever paid is not the medal his parents will receive but his comrades draping his body in an American flag and crying as he is flown off the battle field for the last time.

If only you knew,

That while I weep for those lost in battle that I could not save, my heart forever aches for those left carry-on after answering the door to find a man in uniform with a cross pinned to his collar.

If only you knew,

That for every single time I look at my family or hold my wife, I can count the dozens of times I almost did not come home.

If only you knew,

That while I value most my God, and my values of Honor, Courage, Commitment, Duty, and Country run high; I do not fight for you. I fight for the memory of those that have served before me, the bond of those serving beside me, and for the heritage of those that will carry-on long after I am gone.

If only you knew,

That the liberties you take for granted today are available because someone else has sacrificed and is sacrificing while you go-on with your daily life. You may rest easy and be assured that you can sleep well at night, because we are awake and vigilant, from the seven seas, to the four corners of the earth.

Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy–meditate on these things. Phillipians 4:8

About the author: Scot Reid is a Chief Hospital Corpsman with 22 years continuous active duty in the U.S. Navy. This after his return from Operation Iraqi Freedom where he was wounded in combat operations in the fight for An Nasariyah while serving with the U.S. Marines providing front-line casualty evacuation as a flight medic.